Link 30 Jul 34,236 notes "Should parents read their daughter's texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?"»

daeranilen:

daeranilen:

Earlier today, I served as the “young woman’s voice” in a panel of local experts at a Girl Scouts speaking event. One question for the panel was something to the effect of, "Should parents read their daughter’s texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?"

I was surprised when the first panelist answered the question as if it were about cyberbullying. The adult audience nodded sagely as she spoke about the importance of protecting children online.

I reached for the microphone next. I said, “As far as reading your child’s texts or logging into their social media profiles, I would say 99.9% of the time, do not do that.”

Looks of total shock answered me. I actually saw heads jerk back in surprise. Even some of my fellow panelists blinked.

Everyone stared as I explained that going behind a child’s back in such a way severs the bond of trust with the parent. When I said, “This is the most effective way to ensure that your child never tells you anything,” it was like I’d delivered a revelation.

It’s easy to talk about the disconnect between the old and the young, but I don’t think I’d ever been so slapped in the face by the reality of it. It was clear that for most of the parents I spoke to, the idea of such actions as a violation had never occurred to them at all.

It alarms me how quickly adults forget that children are people.

Apparently people are rediscovering this post somehow and I think that’s pretty cool! Having experienced similar violations of trust in my youth, this is an important issue to me, so I want to add my personal story:

Around age 13, I tried to express to my mother that I thought I might have clinical depression, and she snapped at me “not to joke about things like that.” I stopped telling my mother when I felt depressed.

Around age 15, I caught my mother reading my diary. She confessed that any time she saw me write in my diary, she would sneak into my room and read it, because I only wrote when I was upset. I stopped keeping a diary.

Around age 18, I had an emotional breakdown while on vacation because I didn’t want to go to college. I ended up seeing a therapist for - surprise surprise - depression.

Around age 21, I spoke on this panel with my mother in the audience, and afterwards I mentioned the diary incident to her with respect to this particular Q&A. Her eyes welled up, and she said, “You know I read those because I was worried you were depressed and going to hurt yourself, right?”

TL;DR: When you invade your child’s privacy, you communicate three things:

  1. You do not respect their rights as an individual.
  2. You do not trust them to navigate problems or seek help on their own.
  3. You probably haven’t been listening to them.

Information about almost every issue that you think you have to snoop for can probably be obtained by communicating with and listening to your child.

Video 30 Jul 904 notes

Fangirl challenge: [2/10] pairings » Parker and Hardison (Leverage)

So, the thing is, I think that maybe I might be having feelings. Like weird, weird feelings for….. pretzels.

Pretzels. Okay. Well, they’re right here when you want them.

(Source: jburkheart)

Quote 30 Jul 12,810 notes
These are forms of male aggression that only women see. But even when men are afforded a front seat to harassment, they don’t always have the correct vantage point for recognizing the subtlety of its operation. Four years before the murders, I was sitting in a bar in Washington, D.C. with a male friend. Another young woman was alone at the bar when an older man scooted next to her. He was aggressive, wasted, and sitting too close, but she smiled curtly at his ramblings and laughed softly at his jokes as she patiently downed her drink. ‘Why is she humoring him?’ my friend asked me. ‘You would never do that.’ I was too embarrassed to say: ‘Because he looks scary’ and ‘I do it all the time.’

Women who have experienced this can recognize that placating these men is a rational choice, a form of self-defense to protect against setting off an aggressor. But to male bystanders, it often looks like a warm welcome, and that helps to shift blame in the public eye from the harasser and onto his target, who’s failed to respond with the type of masculine bravado that men more easily recognize.
Text 30 Jul 9,646 notes

susanstrom:

people say loki’s actions are excused because of his parents, but kurt wagners parents were a demon and an evil mutant who threw him in a river minutes after he was born and he grew up to be the sweetest person on the planet do you see how your argument is invalid

Video 30 Jul 250 notes

atomiicangel:

Oracion Derp
Going on a date with Cobra obviously means: SERPENTARIUM!

Video 30 Jul 378,363 notes

(Source: bananapolisher)

Photo 30 Jul 1,440 notes 
Natsu forgot how to Natsu

Natsu forgot how to Natsu

(Source: blanania)

Chat 30 Jul 21,576 notes
  • Male author: I guess women are people
  • Fans: I CAN'T STOP CRYING, THIS IS WHAT A FEMINIST LOOKS LIKE!
Video 30 Jul 51,442 notes

(Source: filthypiratehooker)

Video 30 Jul 4,522 notes

niuniente:

I never get tired with petalpops’s au where Haru merman lives in Iwatobi pool. I will be tagging these au things as “haru in iwatobi pool”. 

Makoto, you have no idea…

via waterever.
Video 30 Jul 1,759 notes

beastlyworlds:

Dean and Seamus kicking back

Photo 30 Jul 392 notes 
Magnolia - DO NOT REMOVE SOURCE. DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE WITHOUT SOURCE.
Magnolia - DO NOT REMOVE SOURCE. DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE WITHOUT SOURCE.
Text 30 Jul 223 notes

Anonymous said: You know, I am extremely intrigued by a Mard Geer vs Meredy fight. I mean, Mard doesn't give a crap about human emotions, finding them frivolous, laughable, ignorant and all. So, I'm very interested what his reaction will be when Meredy makes a Sensory Link with him and in the process, being overwhelmed by her sheer emotions and ideals during the midst of the battle. Seriously. I would love to see that happening. Oh, sounds to me this is the beginning of a new ship haha XD

blamedorange:

HAHAHA YES THEN HOW ABOUT WHEN MEREDY LINKS HIM TO JELLAL

image

Photo 30 Jul 326,477 notes glowcloud:

this a strange dog, why this dog the same size as me (a dog), but not smell like dog???? not sure what happen, owner what u think?

glowcloud:

this a strange dog, why this dog the same size as me (a dog), but not smell like dog???? not sure what happen, owner what u think?

(Source: bunnyfood)

Video 30 Jul 38,777 notes

sbpanthera:

dynastylnoire:

this has been a public service announcement.

real nigga SMOKER’S ANTHEM

(Source: jaylool)


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